Little Miss Muppet — A clearly adult woman laughs over breakfast at a sunny Central Valley café as a beautiful oversized garden spider lowers harmlessly beside her

The songbook

Little Miss Muppet

Words by Douglas Heyes Jr. Listen to the recorded versions and follow the lyric below.

Original Doug Heyes lyrics · AI-generated music & vocals

This very short, deliberately crude nursery-rhyme parody turns a familiar encounter with a spider into grotesque shock humor, ending with a violent reversal rather than a conventional childhood punch line.

Listen

Recorded versions

3 recordings. Different voices and arrangements bring another side of the song into the light.

Lyrics

Little Miss Muppet

Words by Douglas Heyes Jr

Save Lyrics as Text
Little Miss Muppet
Sat on her Puppet
Hoping that she would get Laid
Along came a Spider
And crawled up inside her
And ate her Vagina away....

© Douglas Heyes Jr. All rights reserved.